What Does Your Family Do That Other Families Don’t?

Every family has its idiosyncrasies. Maybe yours is the kind that eats Chinese food every Christmas Eve. Maybe you all pile into the car for a movie on Thanksgiving night. Maybe your family can’t get through a gathering without breaking into loud laughter, or maybe everyone speaks softly and keeps things calm.

We all carry these little rhythms with us, and for most of our lives we assume they’re normal. It’s only when we step into someone else’s home, marry into another family, or join a new church community that we start to realize just how different people can be.

And sometimes those differences feel funny or sweet. Other times they create tension. Because whether we mean to or not, most of us assume that the way we were raised is the way life is supposed to work.

But scripture has a gentle way of reminding us that God is forming a new kind of family in Christ, one where our backgrounds, habits, and preferences are no longer the things that define us.

Paul writes in Ephesians 4:2–3, “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.”
That phrase “bearing with one another” only makes sense when we admit that we all come from different places with different expectations. Unity isn’t built by pretending we’re the same. It’s built by choosing love because we’re not.

And Jesus sets the tone for this new kind of family. When He says in John 13:34, “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you,” He doesn’t give us permission to love only when people act like us, think like us, or come from families that behave the way ours did. He calls us to something deeper and better.

So let me ask you:
What are the things your family does that other families may not?
What traditions shaped you? What unspoken rules guided how you interacted with people?

These memories matter, not so we can judge which is “right,” but so we can understand how those patterns influence the way we love our spouses, raise our kids, serve in our churches, or even handle conflict.

When we slow down and reflect, we start to see how God uses our stories to shape us. And we start to see places where He invites us to grow, soften, forgive, or rethink how we relate to others.

Take a moment today to think about your family’s traditions and rhythms. Thank God for the ones that brought joy to your life. Lay the harder ones before Him. And then ask Him to help you love others not based on your old default settings, but with the grace, patience, and kindness He’s shown you.

Because the beautiful truth is this: in Christ, every one of us gets to learn a new way to be family.